Author Archives: Razan

My Class

razan-2-2.JPG

Three weeks have passed, and 1 week only is left.. time passed by quickly. We’ve learned a lot in so little time. My classmates were definitely an important factor in this positive learning experience, more or less everyone was on the same level, so we didn’t have problems moving on.

In my class we were ten students, Gordana from Serbia/Canda, we sat next to each other, and quite often we got hush-hushed by Johanna, out teacher :P

Then there was Martin from Sweden, he is an artist! He sings, plays the guitar, and I think he does a bunch of other things. You could tell from his looks that he is made for music, he is funny, and surely confident.

We had also our two dear Brazilians, one from Rio de Janeiro, and the other from Sao Paolo, but I don’t know which is from where, hehe. One is Liana, she is a researcher, and the other is my friend Eduardo, he’s a young web designer, and he likes traveling.. maybe for those two I saw a bit of myself in him.

Ingvild from Norway is also an artist, she does photography, writing and I think also paints, and she has beautiful eyes and style!

Richard from USA works in a law firm here, we saw him a few times in our class :P

Then Gyorgy from Solvakia.. whenever I think about him, I think about the word “aber..”! Lol. He is so sweet.

Djibooo, she got me a hamburger the other day, and some chocolate for everyone! When Johanna asked her “ was bist du von beruf?” she answered “i am a tourist!”.. I dont know but we found it really funny then.. but then I found out she also plays soccer here, maybe this is what she does “von beruf”. She is from Niga, don’t mix it up with Niagara.

Then comes Marina from Russia, who had experienced Berlin’s Underground for the first time the other day, after about a year of living here! Wow, right? :D Marina has usually very funny answers for the exercises we have in class.

My dear classmates, you made this course a wonderful experience, it wouldn’t have been the same without each one of you! :)

Raz

Rubik’s Cube Party

Last Saturday I went to this event, called Rubik’s Cube Party. I wasn’t really planning to go since I was at the Visual Voltage exhibition earlier, but my friend insisted that we should go so I thought to myself, “Well, its just a Rubik’s Cube party, whats the worse that can happen? Trying to solve it and failing? What the hell, we’re going!”

So I arrive there, and my friends are all dressed up like clowns! Everyone was wearing green, red, white, yellow, all together! When they saw me in my jeans and green pullover, they got disappointed. I was like, huh?

Apparently, there are no Rubik’s cubes at all, so what is the party is all about?

The idea is that you get dressed up as Rubik’s cube wearing different colour clothes. Throughout the night you swap clothes with people at the event until you are wearing all one colour clothes. You are not going to get your clothes back at the end of the night, but you might be leaving with someone else’s clothes! Lol. So when you make it to one colour, you can go and ask the photographer to take a photo of you, then you start your search for the next colour!

I managed to be all green, all red, and all white! that was so much fun :D

Me on the way to green :)

He made it!

Half a Life

On Christmas, I received a book as a gift from a dear friend of mine. I was like, oh.. a book.. thanks! “Since when do I read novels..?” I thought to myself. On my way back to Potsdam, I opened this book, and started reading.. And I’ve never in my life had such an experience with a book, to dive so deep in the story, sense all details, be able to picture the place and the people. Maybe because my life at the moment is very similar to Willi’s, the main character in the book. Wondering if my friend chose this book randomly, or if she picked it specifically knowing the Willi and I are searching for the same answers.

Willi is an Indian whose dad is from the Caste (middle class) and his mom is from the backwards. At the time of the Mahatma, Willi’s dad felt like he should also make a sacrifice, he responded to the Mahtma’s call and burnt his English books, quit the University, and chose to marry this ugly girl who is a backward. After that his life changed, and things went bad.. the fruits of this marriage was Willi and his sister. The marriage was an unhappy one, Willi’s dad never really liked his wife or kids. For that, Willi was miserable.

Not only this, but also having a mixed background caused him nonacceptance in both the Caste and the backwards. He never felt he belongs to any, he always felt he has to leave.

Being a student in a missionary school, he knew a little about the west from his Canadian teachers, and he decided to go there for college. He ends up in a college in London.

In post-war London, he saw the bohemian life, the clubs, and girls. With the latter, he had serious issues. Willi couldn’t find a girl for himself, he only slept with his friends‘ girlfriend, and prostitutes, and he was really bad at sex. He blamed his dad and his culture for this, he never felt his manhood compelete, every girl kicked him off.. and the same feeling of nonacceptance he had back in India, had started again in London. His only hope for acceptance was a book he wrote, and like Willi, it didn’t have any success. There was as well a big mess for the black people there, a black man got stabbed in a riot, and since then he had to be careful and felt even stranger than before.

His college studies was about to finish, Willi thought, “I don’t know where I am going. I am just letting the days go by. I don’t like the place that’s waiting for me at home. For the past two and a half years I have lived like a free man. I can’t go back to the other thing.” Around that time, a woman has read his book, and sent him a letter, she had a big appreciation for him. They met, they talked, they had sex and it was good. Never in his life Willi felt so accepted. Her name was Ana, she was half African half Portuguese.

College finished, Ana was about to go back to Africa. Having nowhere to go, Willi said to her, “Ana, I would like to go with you to Africa. You’ve read my stories. You know I’ve nowhere else to go. And I don’t want to lose you.” He goes with her back to Africa, and when right when he arrived, he realized he hates that place, and he does not belong there either. Willi thought, “I don’t know where I am. I don’t think I can pick my way back. I don’t ever want this view to become familiar. I must not unpack. I must never behave as though I am staying.”

He stayed for eighteen years.

Days went by him, boring and stale. He was hiding in Ana’s life, he didn’t have a name, he was for everyone Ana’s man. Eventually, at the age of forty-one, Willi had the courage to tell Ana he wants to divorce her. “I am tired of living your life”, he said to her.

“You wanted it, Willi. You asked. I had to think about it.”

 “I know, You did everything for me. You made it easy for me here. I couldn’t have lived here without you. When I asked you in London I was frightened. I had nowhere to go. They were going to throw me out of college at the end of the term and I didn’t know what I could do to keep afloat. But now the best part of my life has gone, and I’ve done nothing. I have been hiding in your life for too long.”

Ana said, “Perhaps it wasn’t really my life either.”